Thursday, March 26, 2015

Nip. Tuck...

Lucy and I just finished our last walk through the neighborhood for...awhile. Tomorrow is the big plastic surgery day. Yep, going under the knife! I imagine Lucy and I will both be a bit too embarrassed to still walk through the neighborhood, at least until the stitches come out and the fur grows back. Yes, I said fur. What? Did you think I was going under the knife? Silly you!

I have had my bout with surgeries: bilateral bunionectomy, not fun. Deviated septum, painful, my nose packed with gauze, splints stuck up each nostril, unpleasant. The worst was having my uvula lasered, three times, probably the most difficult surgery ever. Imagine having a searing red hot poker stuck down your throat for about three weeks, multiply that times three. When it comes to me and the knife, I opt out. 

Would I appreciate having my sagging eyelids lifted? You betcha. Would I treasure a neck that isn’t all crepey? Absolutely. Would I value not looking bulldogish my mouth beginning to droop right into my jowls? Without a doubt. Am I willing to undergo pain and suffering? I think not. I am just fine with my wrinkles and signs of aging, well, at least until I startle myself when I accidentally turn my cell phone on and it’s in selfie mode. When I see myself up close and personal, I actually shriek out loud. Not to mention, looking at a photo of myself, “Do I really look that bad?” Oh well, I figure this is the best I am ever going to look, so I might as well savor the moment.

So back to nip, tuck. When I adopted Lucy, I was a little put off by some rather large fatty tumors that dominated the trunk and neck of my sweet dog’s body. After 18 months of living with this amazing furry beast I have come to love each of those little, okay quite large lumps, as they are part and parcel of Lucy. I was told, early on, that the lumps were simply fatty tumors, there was nothing to be alarmed about. Over time, the lumps have grown, kind of grotesquely, to the point that Lucy's neck lump might well be a second head. We made a visit to the vet last week and had the growing tumors biopsied. It seems they are nothing to be concerned about, but the vet feels like it would be in Lucy’s best interest to have them removed.  Of course she does, $1,000 later, Lucy will be lump free.

"Lucy to the Rescue" Ann Denton Werline

Couple this with my $4,000 rat infestation, which turns out was one big crummy, now dead and gone rat. I could have taken one really nice trip…like back to Argentina, or taken my family, almost, back to Belize. Oh no, instead, I am footing the bill for the extermination of one rat and five non-harmful dog tumors.

Such is life! In a month or so, Lucy will be adorable again, and tumor free. I will have no more worries about "Ben" and friends, as my house has been hermetically sealed. Oh, I will still have droopy eyelids, a crepey neck, and look like a bulldog, but hey, I am blessed beyond measure.

For what it’s worth,

1 Samuel 16:7  “God judges persons differently than humans do. Men look at the face; God looks into the heart.”

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