A lesson from Lucy...

Lucy and I try our best to walk every morning.  It’s been hotter than blue blazes these last few weeks and Lucy and I are feeling our age. Our fatigue, and the heat can get the best of us as the hot San Antonio temperatures drone on.

We start our walks rather peppy and quick paced, but after about 30 minutes we begin to wilt.  Lucy, at the end of her leash begins slowing her pace, panting heavier with each step and stopping often to sniff and smell anything that gives her cause. 

I, if given a choice, would much rather plow ahead and get this grueling routine over and done and therefore, I just may lose sight of a slice of delight that might be hiding right beneath my tennis shoes.

The past few weeks Lucy has resorted to a new little routine that she finds completely refreshing and I must admit, I find hysterically funny.  Walking along my neighborhood sidewalks, my mind floats off in a thousand directions. Suddenly I am brought back to the present when I feel a tug on the end of the leash.  Shaking my mind back into reality, I look up to find Lucy has found a neighbor’s lawn that is being watered.  

Lucy has a new definite and very exact ritual that she now performs daily.  The first hint of fatigue, the girl begins sniffing out any possibility of water. Next, she gently, cleverly, and slyly, so as not to disturb my deep in thought pace, creeps onto the lawn being sprinkled.  Her furry paws tip toe into the wet grass and bam, she’s down.  Rolling with great gusto across the sprinkler heads, face planting her head, ears and cute little black button nose, into the cool wetness beneath her, she then, dexterously snakes her body through the blades of grass to ensure that every inch of her hot tired figure is soaked to the core by the cool water.  Her last phase of this routine is to lie perfectly still, her little head burrowed down between her paws, with great dollops of water hanging from her now long drooping eyebrows, she looks up at me with her big brown eyes and I swear she smiles. She is happy and content that she has found a way to refresh her body, mind and soul.

Quite a few of my neighbors have witnessed me standing there, staring at my goofy saturated dog. Lucy laying in the middle of someone’s lawn with their sprinklers running at full blast, and me at the other end of the leash, laughing out loud at her genius and her delight.

The other day I was sitting by a good and very special friend who was having one of those times when life seems simply overwhelming, one of those moments that tend to drone on and on.  

We all have moments like this, when tears just begin to flow.  There is no rhyme, no reason for the tears other than they are utterly our only release from life’s hot summer sun. Our immediate response might be to plow forward, hoping to overcome the heaviness with a mindset to simply endure, to march forward, and hope the sadness, the heaviness, passes quickly, so that we can mark it off of our life's must-do list.

I think Lucy has discovered the solution to the fatigue that life brings, and I think we might all learn a lesson from her.  Unlike me, who feels the need to trudge on hot, sweaty and tired, determined to complete my walk as quickly as possible, my wise dog, finds that when it’s time to stop, rest and soak in life, then one should do it, right then and there.  

Lucy has taught me you don’t have to trudge on when life seems unbearable. Instead, take that unrivaled moment and stop, plop down and enjoy what lies beneath your paw steps and submerge yourself in that moment. Soak joy and delight into every fiber of your being, and once you feel totally satiated, be still, and take note of all that is around you. Finally, look up with a smile of thanksgiving and be grateful to the One that deserves our gratitude.

At the end of Lucy’s little routine, she will suddenly jump back on her feet, and she will give her body a might shake.  Water will fly off her coat, she will regain her stature and onward she proceeds, but not before looking back at me, as if to say, “Come on what’s the hold up?  We still have a long way to go before we are finished.”

For what it’s worth,

Janet & Lucy

Matthew 11: 28-30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Out of the mouths of babes...

Flying home from Carmel, after a wonderful trip with friends, Jared and the children picked me up from the airport.  Brooke was doing a run for a cause that night, so she wasn’t with us in the car.  Squeals of delight greeted me when I opened the car door. There is nothing in this world better than coming home to such enthusiasm.

Harper began telling me all about her first week of school with Harris chiming in, “Me too!  Me too!”  Next, Harper told me all about how her mommy had taken them to the San Antonio Museum of Art to show them the Matisse exhibit.  She loved seeing all the colorful art and Harris, “Me too!  Me Too!” expressed his excitement over their outing.  I admit, I was impressed that my daughter was enlightening my grand babies in art appreciation.

I took a minute to catch up with Jared about his week, but was soon interrupted by Harper.  The conversation went something like this:

Harper: “Honey, why were those men so mean to Jesus?”  It was out of the blue.

Me: “Who was mean to Jesus?”

Harper: “You know those men who stuck him on the cross, and then poked a stick in his side and made him bleed!”

What?!?  How in the world did a innocent little four year old come up with this?  Surely they were not teaching the crucifixion in her Sunday School, certainly the first week of Methodist Day School wasn’t revolving around Christ’s crucifixion. I stumbled over my words, as my thoughts ran rampant, trying to decide how best to answer her very sincere questions.

I mumbled to Jared, “Where is this coming from?”  He shrugged, clueless.

Me: “Oh Harper, that was very sad that that happened to Jesus wasn’t it?”  The old answer a question with a question diversion tactic.  It didn’t fly.

Harper: "They were so mean, why did they make his side bleed?  Why would anyone do that to Jesus?"  Jeez Louise, how was I going to answer her?

Me: “Oh Harper,  I think they were really more afraid than they were being mean. I don’t think they understood Jesus and all that he was teaching.”  Not enough, as her gaze didn’t waver from my lips and her determination for an appropriate answer remained resolute.

I continued on. “Jesus was trying to teach everyone to be kind and loving and treat each other equally, but some people just couldn’t understand and they wanted Jesus to go away.”  This was not going well at all...I decided if I got her off task maybe she would move on.

 “Harper, who told you about all of this? Jesus getting his side pierced and well, everything else?” Thinking she would move on to who told her this vivid information and her forget her fixation of Christ’s suffering.

Harper: “Nobody Honey, I saw it in the PICTURE at the museum.  It was so sad, it made me sad too. Tell me why they hurt Jesus, Honey?  They made him bleed and everything!”

Well, at least now I knew where this was coming from.  Obviously, when Brooke finished the Matisse exhibit they cruised over to the Baroque section of the museum.  

Whew, I was really glad those Methodists hadn’t started 4 year old preschool with the crucifixion along with the zoo animal alphabet.  A is for Anteater, B is for Bear, C is for Crucifixion and S is for the spear that they poked in the Jesus side to make him bleed.

I think our conversation finally ended with Jared, using his defense mechanism (a Harper term for “what living things use to protect themselves” which Jared and I were desperately trying to do, defend ourselves) wisely pointing to a large airplane overhead. Thankfully we moved onto sky objects.

Later that night, Brooke called to ask me about my trip.  I had asked to keep the kids the following night, it was then Brooke shyly mentioned, “Mom, Harper may ask you some questions about ...” the words weren’t out of her mouth before I said, “Oh, too late!”  We both started laughing.  

Brooke explained how she and the children had decided to walk through more of the museum before leaving and had accidentally stumbled on the Baroque art.  She thought she had spotted the crucifixion before the kids had and tried to turn them around and head for a less tortured area, but Harper’s curious little eyes had grabbed hold of the floor to ceiling depiction of Christ’s in all his agony, and the rest is history.

Brooke went on to explain, and this is where the sheepishness in her voice came. After many endless hours had been spent pouring through their children’s Bible, Brooke had pointed out all of the kind and gentle pictures of Jesus. Brooke went on and on about the wonderful life of Jesus shared with everyone who he met.  She explained in detail all the wonderful pictures of baby Jesus, Jesus with the little children, Jesus helping the sick. Then they came upon a picture of Moses, staff in hand.  

Horrified, Harper pointed to poor old Moses and exclaimed, “There's one of those bad men, see he has that poker in his hand!”  Brooke pulled out all the stops in telling Harper all she could about Moses and his famous staff. After several days of The Harper Interrogation
Brooke, who never caves, finally caved and told Harper that she could ask Daddy and Honey all of these same questions and maybe they could help her understand a little better.

Now I will tell you that while raising Brent and Brooke I had my fair share of convoluted questions.  Brent, making me to promise I would tell him the truth, asked me if there really was a Santa Claus.  Oh how I anguished over that one.  In the end I told him the truth, but made him promise we would never talk about it again. I simply couldn’t look my child in the face and blatantly lie, maybe I should have. I will always question if my answer was correct or not.  

Then there was the time Brent asked me how babies were made.  He was only six or seven, so I did the whole mommy and daddy love each other so much that God plants a seed in the mommy’s tummy...I was so proud of my flowery explanation, but was stopped short when his following question was, “Well, then what do condoms (he might have actually used the word rubbers, ugh)  have to do with that whole story?”  It seems Brent had spent the night with a friend with older brothers and “Animal House” was their entertainment for the night.

In short, I thought I was done with the complicated, complex questions of life.  I thought, I had gotten through childhood and early adulthood without them being scarred and interviewed by Oprah about how I had totally messed them up with my inarticulate answers.  Oh no, there is now another generation of sweet innocence that I can have a go at totally confusing.

All I know is, I will never have all the answers.  I also know that we are so blessed to have these precious and curious little questioning minds.  All any of us can do is try our best to stay honest, give them answers as they can best understand them and talk and talk and talk some more as long as they will listen to us.

For what it’s worth,

Honey

Matthew 21:16 “They asked Jesus, "Do you hear what these children are saying?" "Yes," Jesus replied. "Haven't you ever read the Scriptures? For they say, 'You have taught children and infants to give you praise.'"

The Runaway Bunny...

I have a mountain of children’s books lining several of the lower shelves throughout my home.  I have collected some of them from my childhood, some from Brent and Brooke’s early years, and some I have purchased in the last several years for Harper and Harris to enjoy.

Harper and Harris love to be read to, and as I read, they have many questions about the characters in the books.  We talk at length about the illustrations on each page and we love to point out the obscure, often silly, always eye-catching pictures on the pages.

I’m sure many of you are familiar with Margaret Wise Brown.  Two of our (that would be Brent and Brooke when they were younger and now Harper and Harris) favorite books are MWB’s Goodnight Moon and The Runaway Bunny.  These are beautiful, simple and profoundly written words and Clement Hurd's illustrations have always been among my favorites.

Several weeks ago Harris brought The Runaway Bunny to me to read.  Harper crept into my lap beside Harris and we read this enchanting little book, and we read it and we read it.  In the last several weeks we have probably read TRB twenty-thirty times.

I was surprised that this was the first time they had been introduced to this book, as I have read Goodnight Moon to both of them since they were small babies.

The questions began. 

Harper: “Why did the little boy bunny want to runaway from his mommy?  Did the baby bunny not love his mommy? What did the little bunny do to want to runaway?”  

Harris: “”Yeah Hoamy! why-aa?”  (This is Harris speak and I love it.)

All thirty times we read, the questions are repeated like a broken record.  My answer is always the same.  My explanation. The little bunny didn’t really want to runaway from his mommy because he loved her very much.  The mommy bunny is older and wiser than the little bunny and she knows her little boy is simply wanting to be reassured that no matter where he goes, or what he does, or how lost he may get, nothing will stop the mother bunny from finding him. This mommy bunny is telling her son, he has no need of being afraid because her love for him is so great she will always find him, no matter what.

My early morning quiet time was spent this morning reading Psalms 139: 7-10 “ Your Spirit is everywhere I go. I cannot escape your presence. If I go up to heaven, you will be there. If I go down to the place of death, you will be there. If I go east where the sun rises or go to live in the west beyond the sea, even there you will take my hand and lead me. Your strong right hand will protect me.”

My mind instantly was filled with the words and the illustrations in The Runaway Bunny.  I wondered if MWB might have been inspired by this scripture in Psalms? This little children’s book is as full of loving kindness and undying love, as were David’s writings in Psalms.

I saw God as the wise and gentle mother bunny.  As the baby bunny became a bird so that he could fly away from his mommy, the mother bunny became the a wonderful “bunny” tree that the bunny bird flew to.  As the baby bunny’s ears turned into large pink sails so that he could sail away from his mommy, the mommy became the wind and blew him back to her. 

The little bunny’s last shot at running away was to become a little human boy. The mother bunny’s response was that she would become his human mother and catch him in her arms and hug him. My brain had a sudden ah-ha moment.  Isn’t this exactly what God did for us through his son Jesus Christ?  Does God not love us so much that no matter what we do, how fast or far away we run from him, he is there meeting each of us exactly where we are? His arms outstretched catching us and embracing us with all his might. I believe God knows that we are fearful, he knows that we need constant assurance of his steadfast love and impeccable care, and he is capable of finding us wherever we might be.

The last lines in the book read:

 “Shucks,” said the bunny, I might just as well stay where I am and be your little bunny.”

 And so he did.

“Have a carrot,” said the mother bunny. 

Clement Hurd's last page is a colorful drawing of the mother and baby bunny safe in the hollow of a large tree snuggled together with a carrot. 

“ Your Spirit is everywhere I go. I cannot escape your presence...If I go east where the sun rises or go to live in the west beyond the sea, even there you will take my hand and lead me. Your strong right hand will protect me.”

 I will never know how Margaret Wise Brown’s words were intended to be perceived, but what I do know is that I have a much greater explanation to give my grandchildren when they ask me again, “Why?”

For what it's worth,

Janet

(The Runaway Bunny Copyright 1942 by Harper & Row, Publishers, Inc.)

Rocks...

The patio is complete and all but a little yard work is left before I am finished with this neverending house/yard project.

Right before Kris left I had one last favor to ask him.  I wanted a small area in the corner of my backyard to be a private, quite and very special space.  I showed Kris a basket full of rocks that I have kept near our door since November 2008. Each stone has a scripture written on it’s surface and each one is a unique and precious gift to me.

It was Fall 1995, when I joined a very special group of women who I have become my body of Christ. The group has changed and morphed over these nineteen years.  Some of our members have moved, some sadly passed away. New members came as old members left, but I continue to feel a very strong connection to women who have been and still are a part of this group.  

This is a group of spirit-filled, Godly women who have celebrated, laughed, cried, prayed and supported one another through every experience life could imagine. These of women have been responsible for creating a sweet ministry that has blessed untold numbers of people, and I have thankfully been not only a part of this group, but also the recipient of their loving kindness.  

One day soon after we learned of Steve’s tumor, I found a rock on our front door step with a Bible verse written on it’s surface. The next day there was another one with a different scripture offering promises of God and hope for the future. Each day we would find a new rock with a new verse that spoke of God’s care for us in times of trouble. These rocks were quietly and anonymously placed on our doorstep as a reminder that we were loved and that we were being prayed for ceaselessly. 

I’m not sure how many weeks the rocks were left, but I know we became highly aware of the love that surrounded us.  This was our body of Christ when we needed him the most, and this body saw us through some of the roughest times of our life.  

The women of The Views Bible Study will always hold a special place in my heart as they stood by my side through all our concerns about Harper, they were there for me during the days after Steve’s death.  It was this body of Christ that brought food, arranged the lunch at the church after Steve’s memorial service, and continues to call and to write me notes of care and concern.

In time, I moved our scripture rocks from the front door to the back and once I moved to this house they came along with me. 

As Kris was finishing up the patio I told him the story behind the rocks and asked if he could create a small space in a corner of the backyard where they could have a permanent home.  

Kris smiled kindly and we began planning this spot.  Early one morning before the concrete was poured, I took some of Steve’s ashes and sprinkled them into the earth that was waiting for the foundation.  It was a private, prayerful time as I pressed Steve’s ashes into the soil and thanked God for a life that was so much a part of mine. Steve will always be with me in this place and I am thankful for this little corner of my world.

Flagstone was laid and each scripture rock was carefully embedded around its perimeter.  The border is uneven, imperfect and wonderful, as each rock is so different.  Now our family will always have a place that has been dedicated in special remembrance to their father, grandfather, brother, son and my husband.

There is a scripture that lies at the cornerstone of this small area.  I found a beautiful rock and wrote these words from Joshua 4: 6-7 “We will use these stones to build a memorial.  In the future, your children will ask, “what do these stones mean?” Then you can tell them.”

Years ago, after the last stone had been delivered to our doorstep, I copied the verses from each rock.  I placed them in an order, that when read, served as a beautiful prayer.  I share this prayer with the women of The Views and I share them with you now. I hope that if ever you need to encourage or support someone going through a difficult time, you might remember these scriptures. They would be a gift and a balm to all who receive them.

For what is worth,

Janet

 “Trust in the Lord forever, for in God the Lord, we have an everlasting Rock.” Isaiah 26:4"The Lord is near to all who call upon Him.”  Psalm 145:18   “In the beginning was the WORD.”  John 1:1 “When I am afraid I will trust in You.”  Psalm 56:3 “God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble.”  Psalm 46:1 “In the day when I cried thou answered me, and strengthened me with strength in my soul.”  Psalm 138: 3  “To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul, in you I trust, O my God.”  Psalm 25:1-2 “You have seen me tossing and turning through the night.  You have collected all my tears and preserved them in your bottle!  You recorded every one in your book.”  Psalm 56:8 “I will lift up my eyes to the hills from whence cometh my help.  My help cometh from the Lord which made heaven and earth.  He will not suffer thy foot to be moved.  He that keepeth thee will not slumber.”  Psalm 121:1-3 “He reached down from on high and took hold of me; He drew me out of deep waters.”  Psalm 18:16 “Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.”  Psalm 61:2 “I will be with you…and the rivers shall not overflow you.  For I am the Lord, thy God, the Holy One.”  Isaiah 43:2-3 “Every time I am in trouble, I call on you, confident that you will answer.”  Psalm 86:7 “Answer me when I call you, oh my righteous God.   Give me relief from my distress.”  Psalm 4:1 “Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint.”  Isaiah 40:31 “Let us run with patience the particular race that God has set before us.”   Hebrews 12:1 “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.” Malachi 4:2 “But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings.”  Matthew 11:28 “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him.”  1Corinthians 2:9 “In me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulations but, be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”  John 16:33 “The Lord will fight for you; you need only be still.”  Exodus 14:14 “Be still and KNOW that I AM GOD.”  Psalm 46:10 “I will not leave you comfortless.  I will come to you.”  John 14:18 “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you.”  John 14:27 “May the Lord watch over you and give you peace.”  Numbers 6:26 “Sing to the Lord with Thanksgiving.”  Psalm 147:7 “May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you.”   Psalm 33:22
Amen